For the past few days, I have been fighting a pretty terrible upper respiratory infection which has caused me SEVERE dehydration. Neither of which are fun…at all.
My lack of sleep has been steady, dramatic, and exhaustive. Sleep, these days, has been very important. It has been the only way to rejuvenate my spirit and physical body because my early morning ritualistic gratitude list, desired wants, and morning meditation haven’t proven enough.
So, after not another good night of sleep, I woke up at 6am to pee for the third time last night (due to the insane amount of fluids I have drank over the past 24-48 hours). Earlier in the night, I dreamt that I was a telekinetic genius that could profoundly influence anything I wanted. It was incredible. As I sank back into bed, this time, with the lovely notion of perhaps 120 more minutes of sleep, I thought about how awesome telekinesis would be. And, may I add, quickly fell right back to sleep (for the first time in three nights).
Through a weird series of situational events (because, let’s be honest, are anyone’s dreams linear?), I came onto my new Los Angeles digs where I had three amazing roommates all from very different times in my life. I gave thanks to them this morning on Facebook right before I decided to write this blog. (My first blog in a very long time…). At the end of the three king-size roommate montage in my dream, I realized I had to move my “rental” car for street cleaning. Duh!
As I walked out of my apartment and walked down this completely unrecognizable Los Angeles-appearing street, I saw SNOW on the ground. No biggie, just six inches or so (not like the 2 feet my family just had in Boston).
There, next to me, was a Vanessa Redgrave
-like woman from her earlier days (just watched Foxcatcher
). She must have seen the stupefied look on my face as she gently advised me that it usually snows 3-4 times per year in Los Angeles. I thought to myself. WTF? What? No, it does not.
I knew then that this was a lie!
It never snows in Los Angeles. I kept thinking that sooo does not make sense. That’s not why I moved to L.A. Finally, as I started to walk back to my weird apartment, I realized I was in a dream. Wow! I was dreaming. I was ecstatic. I was beyond words. Perplexed about what to do next, i just frozen within my dream, but only for a second. Because, my next thought was…
I want to meet God.
God? Are you out there? It’s me, Seth Santoro! I didn’t literally think that, but I was convinced that I could meet God in my dream — because why not? All the work done of late with my guides, my meditation, etc… I figured I was ready. (Pfff!) I’m a cocky bitch in my dreams.
For some reason, I thought the best way to meet God was through prayer. I believe I needed to get somewhere special. I wanted to pray at the best place possible, so, naturally, I chose the tallest building in LA, the US Bank building in downtown Los Angeles. I started flying in that direction immediately. That happened. I know. I don’t normally just assume I can fly in dreams, it’s always more of a priviledge. However, in this case, I had taken control of my lucid dream and boom! I could fly…
I bee-lined for downtown and happened over a lake, having my eye on the prize. Just so you know, there is no lake between where I live in West Hollywood and downtown Los Angeles, not even a river. I digress.
I was well on my way when an incredible force took me down. It took me down hard. It took me down fast and it took me down strangely. For a moment, I thought I wasn’t going to get to God, but then something inside told me I was still on the path, just not in the way I had expected. When I hit the lake, I thought that would be it and I would wake up and the dream over. Instead, I went into this beautiful dreamy place. It was sort of Space Mountain
meets the movie “Contact
” with Jodie Foster.
(FYI – The movie, Contact, is ironically, or not so ironically, playing in the background now. I started writing this blog about two hours ago and had no idea it would be on tonight. I promise.)
This vortex of absolute goodness was incredible. There are no words to describe how safe, how gentle, how amazing I felt. It was a spiraling beauty of a wormhole. It was magnificent. It was warm. It felt extraordinary — like nothing I had ever felt previously. I kept thinking I’m going to meet God! I’m about to meet God! What am I going to say? I’m going to meet God! Oh my God!
The next thing I knew, I slowed down. I slowed down almost to a halt. All of a sudden, I looked up and saw two male-like figures digging out some stones. They moved in slow motion and they moved with an interesting intention. I didn’t understand and I still don’t understand entirely. Even now, 12 hours later, I believe that one of them might have been my main spirit guide, but I didn’t see their faces clearly. After all that set up and all that spiraling goodness, I naturally, now, believe that perhaps I wasn’t quite ready to meet God. Oooh. I was so close!
Maybe some day soon?
After the stones, I woke up. I felt such elation like none other. It was blissful, peaceful, and awe-inspiring. I felt as if I was living my purpose and right on time. I felt as if my life is exactly where it needs to be. I felt literally right as rain.
It has been a challenging couple of months for me dealing with a break up; gave my dog away; a couple friends’ deaths; and I’ve been terribly home sick after an incredible two weeks with my family around Christmas/NYE. This dream made it all seem small. It reminded me that life is and can be so much more than these things. I have been feeling for the past two weeks that I am on the precipice of something ginormous and huge happening. I feel that this dream is the beginning to that.
Now, I gotta go watch the wormhole part of the movie.
Happy Belated New Year!
MY HOPES FOR YOU:
1) This year is the best year of your life.
2) You all give and receive as much love as possible.
3) You feel accomplished and appreciated at work.
4) You zipline as much as possible! (It’s one of my resolutions for 2015!)
A Smile From The Inside Production 🙂