Happy 4th Everyone!!! Since i am still trying to find my voice with this blog, and I am exploring the fabulous world of gay-ness as well as the rewarding self-help aspects/techniques through my “Smile From The Inside” world, I wanted to change it up a little today. Today, i’d like to capture what i consider to be something that we all don’t do enough. That is TO LAUGH. I truly believe that one of the secrets to mastering this life is to laugh a lot. One on one, i’m not that funny. Get me in a group, however, and somehow i become hilarious. Really, there’s nothing better than watching people laugh so much it hurts. There are two humorous tales below. One is my own story (from yesterday), while the other is a story someone forwarded to me (yesterday) in an email, which apparently is true. Both stories reminded me that laughter is truly a nice workout for the mind, body, and soul. Enjoy!!!
Last night, my bf and I went to get some passport photos at CVS. The extremely Korean lady behind the photodesk, Marilou, was all too flirty with him throughout the entire 5-minute process, to which he was completely oblivious. As i was paying for the pics, because he had temporary lost his wallet (surprise, surprise), he asked her if she thought the pics were good. She said in her extreme Korean accent, “Oh yes, very handsom’. Even betta’ in person”. Oh, that’s sweet, i might have muffled under my breathe. She continued, “Single?”. I said, “Unfortunately, he’s not single.” She didn’t stop there, “I have daughter???” At this point, I said, “Do you have a son? That’s more up his alley!!!”
Marilou clearly didn’t want to hear what i was saying, and was relentless, “She look for good husband, you good husband???” My bf really didn’t hear what was transpiring until this point, so i turned to him, “She has a daughter???” Then, i turned to this nice middle-aged Korean woman, “Good luck with that, Marilou!!!” I was about to say, “He likes cock, Marilou”…but that probably would have been a little inappropriate. Gee wiz, determination and focus might just get you anything in this world, huh? Or perhaps she was just a little hard of hearing. Who knows???
I promise this story is ten times as funny!
THE GAY FLIGHT ATTENDANT (TRUE STORY): My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that ‘Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he’ll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super!’
On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic looking woman hadn’t moved a muscle. ‘Perhaps you didn’t hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.’
She calmly turned her head and said, ‘In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one.’
To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, ‘Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I’m called a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray-up, Bitch!’
Isn’t that hilarious???!!!
1) I probably say this every week but I do truly appreciate all of the good things you all have to say about my blog. So, if you like it, share it!!!
2) I completed the rough draft for my first book in my trilogy. Now, i am reviewing for edits, and then need a “real” editor to proofread it and tear it apart. Then, i cannot wait to self-publish it! Wish me luck, bitches!!!
3) Because I know most of you have asked about my job situation, i am happy to say that I actually have a short-term HR/Project Manager consultant position for the next 3 months! I start on Thursday!!!
4) A little trivia below…who said these super famous quotes???
If we couldn’t laugh, we’d all go insane! — ???
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter… — ???